Make it look like I'm working
JavaScript
So I went a little crazy with this. I did it between breaks from working on my GUI to track IP's using Visual Basic.
You can access it by going to the super serious domain I made for it tonight as well so you can look busy anywhere Gui Hacker and fork and create your own from the following sources
- Fiddle
- CodePen
- github
Basically, if you have this running no one will bother you because they know you are doing some serious stuff.
var canvas = document.querySelector(".hacker-3d-shiz"),
ctx = canvas.getContext("2d"),
canvasBars = document.querySelector(".bars-and-stuff"),
ctxBars = canvasBars.getContext("2d"),
outputConsole = document.querySelector(".output-console");
canvas.width = (window.innerWidth / 3) * 2;
canvas.height = window.innerHeight / 3;
canvasBars.width = window.innerWidth / 3;
canvasBars.height = canvas.height;
outputConsole.style.height = (window.innerHeight / 3) * 2 + 'px';
outputConsole.style.top = window.innerHeight / 3 + 'px'
/* Graphics stuff */
function Square(z) {
this.width = canvas.width / 2;
this.height = canvas.height;
z = z || 0;
this.points = [
new Point({
x: (canvas.width / 2) - this.width,
y: (canvas.height / 2) - this.height,
z: z
}),
new Point({
x: (canvas.width / 2) + this.width,
y: (canvas.height / 2) - this.height,
z: z
}),
new Point({
x: (canvas.width / 2) + this.width,
y: (canvas.height / 2) + this.height,
z: z
}),
new Point({
x: (canvas.width / 2) - this.width,
y: (canvas.height / 2) + this.height,
z: z
})
];
this.dist = 0;
}
Square.prototype.update = function() {
for (var p = 0; p < this.points.length; p++) {
this.points[p].rotateZ(0.001);
this.points[p].z -= 3;
if (this.points[p].z < -300) {
this.points[p].z = 2700;
}
this.points[p].map2D();
}
}
Square.prototype.render = function() {
ctx.beginPath();
ctx.moveTo(this.points[0].xPos, this.points[0].yPos);
for (var p = 1; p < this.points.length; p++) {
if (this.points[p].z > -(focal - 50)) {
ctx.lineTo(this.points[p].xPos, this.points[p].yPos);
}
}
ctx.closePath();
ctx.stroke();
this.dist = this.points[this.points.length - 1].z;
};
function Point(pos) {
this.x = pos.x - canvas.width / 2 || 0;
this.y = pos.y - canvas.height / 2 || 0;
this.z = pos.z || 0;
this.cX = 0;
this.cY = 0;
this.cZ = 0;
this.xPos = 0;
this.yPos = 0;
this.map2D();
}
Point.prototype.rotateZ = function(angleZ) {
var cosZ = Math.cos(angleZ),
sinZ = Math.sin(angleZ),
x1 = this.x * cosZ - this.y * sinZ,
y1 = this.y * cosZ + this.x * sinZ;
this.x = x1;
this.y = y1;
}
Point.prototype.map2D = function() {
var scaleX = focal / (focal + this.z + this.cZ),
scaleY = focal / (focal + this.z + this.cZ);
this.xPos = vpx + (this.cX + this.x) * scaleX;
this.yPos = vpy + (this.cY + this.y) * scaleY;
};
// Init graphics stuff
var squares = [],
focal = canvas.width / 2,
vpx = canvas.width / 2,
vpy = canvas.height / 2,
barVals = [],
sineVal = 0;
for (var i = 0; i < 15; i++) {
squares.push(new Square(-300 + (i * 200)));
}
//ctx.lineWidth = 2;
ctx.strokeStyle = ctxBars.strokeStyle = ctxBars.fillStyle = '#00FF00';
/* fake console stuff */
var commandStart = ['Performing DNS Lookups for',
'Searching ',
'Analyzing ',
'Estimating Approximate Location of ',
'Compressing ',
'Requesting Authorization From : ',
'wget -a -t ',
'tar -xzf ',
'Entering Location ',
'Compilation Started of ',
'Downloading '
],
commandParts = ['Data Structure',
'http://wwjd.com?au&2',
'Texture',
'TPS Reports',
' .... Searching ... ',
'http://zanb.se/?23&88&far=2',
'http://ab.ret45-33/?timing=1ww'
],
commandResponses = ['Authorizing ',
'Authorized...',
'Access Granted..',
'Going Deeper....',
'Compression Complete.',
'Compilation of Data Structures Complete..',
'Entering Security Console...',
'Encryption Unsuccesful Attempting Retry...',
'Waiting for response...',
'....Searching...',
'Calculating Space Requirements '
],
isProcessing = false,
processTime = 0,
lastProcess = 0;
function render() {
ctx.clearRect(0, 0, canvas.width, canvas.height);
squares.sort(function(a, b) {
return b.dist - a.dist;
});
for (var i = 0, len = squares.length; i < len; i++) {
squares[i].update();
squares[i].render();
}
ctxBars.clearRect(0, 0, canvasBars.width, canvasBars.height);
ctxBars.beginPath();
var y = canvasBars.height / 6;
ctxBars.moveTo(0, y);
for (i = 0; i < canvasBars.width; i++) {
var ran = (Math.random() * 20) - 10;
if (Math.random() > 0.98) {
ran = (Math.random() * 50) - 25
}
ctxBars.lineTo(i, y + ran);
}
ctxBars.stroke();
for (i = 0; i < canvasBars.width; i += 20) {
if (!barVals[i]) {
barVals[i] = {
val: Math.random() * (canvasBars.height / 2),
freq: 0.1,
sineVal: Math.random() * 100
};
}
barVals[i].sineVal += barVals[i].freq;
barVals[i].val += Math.sin(barVals[i].sineVal * Math.PI / 2) * 5;
ctxBars.fillRect(i + 5, canvasBars.height, 15, -barVals[i].val);
}
requestAnimationFrame(render);
}
function consoleOutput() {
var textEl = document.createElement('p');
if (isProcessing) {
textEl = document.createElement('span');
textEl.textContent += Math.random() + " ";
if (Date.now() > lastProcess + processTime) {
isProcessing = false;
}
} else {
var commandType = ~~(Math.random() * 4);
switch (commandType) {
case 0:
textEl.textContent = commandStart[~~(Math.random() * commandStart.length)] + commandParts[~~(Math.random() * commandParts.length)];
break;
case 3:
isProcessing = true;
processTime = ~~(Math.random() * 5000);
lastProcess = Date.now();
default:
textEl.textContent = commandResponses[~~(Math.random() * commandResponses.length)];
break;
}
}
outputConsole.scrollTop = outputConsole.scrollHeight;
outputConsole.appendChild(textEl);
if (outputConsole.scrollHeight > window.innerHeight) {
var removeNodes = outputConsole.querySelectorAll('*');
for (var n = 0; n < ~~(removeNodes.length / 3); n++) {
outputConsole.removeChild(removeNodes[n]);
}
}
setTimeout(consoleOutput, ~~(Math.random() * 200));
}
render();
consoleOutput();
window.addEventListener('resize', function() {
canvas.width = (window.innerWidth / 3) * 2;
canvas.height = window.innerHeight / 3;
canvasBars.width = window.innerWidth / 3;
canvasBars.height = canvas.height;
outputConsole.style.height = (window.innerHeight / 3) * 2 + 'px';
outputConsole.style.top = window.innerHeight / 3 + 'px';
focal = canvas.width / 2;
vpx = canvas.width / 2;
vpy = canvas.height / 2;
ctx.strokeStyle = ctxBars.strokeStyle = ctxBars.fillStyle = '#00FF00';
});@font-face {
font-family: 'Source Code Pro';
font-style: normal;
font-weight: 400;
src: local('Source Code Pro'), local('SourceCodePro-Regular'), url(http://themes.googleusercontent.com/static/fonts/sourcecodepro/v4/mrl8jkM18OlOQN8JLgasDxM0YzuT7MdOe03otPbuUS0.woff) format('woff');
}
body {
font-family: 'Source Code Pro';
background: #000;
color: #00FF00;
margin: 0;
font-size: 13px;
}
canvas {
position: absolute;
top: 0;
left: 0;
}
.bars-and-stuff {
left: 66.6%;
}
.output-console {
position: fixed;
overflow: hidden;
}
p {
margin: 0
}<canvas class='hacker-3d-shiz'></canvas>
<canvas class='bars-and-stuff'></canvas>
<div class="output-console"></div>Bash / coreutils
Introducing the first ever... compilation emulator. With this program, you can have epic office chair sword battles any time you like, without even writing any code!
#!/bin/bash
collect()
{
while read line;do
if [ -d "$line" ];then
(for i in "$line"/*;do echo $i;done)|sort -R|collect
echo $line
elif [[ "$line" == *".h" ]];then
echo $line
fi
done
}
sse="$(awk '/flags/{print;exit}' </proc/cpuinfo|grep -o 'sse\S*'|sed 's/^/-m/'|xargs)"
flags=""
pd="\\"
while true;do
collect <<< /usr/include|cut -d/ -f4-|
(
while read line;do
if [ "$(dirname "$line")" != "$pd" ];then
x=$((RANDOM%8-3))
if [[ "$x" != "-"* ]];then
ssef="$(sed 's/\( *\S\S*\)\{'"$x,$x"'\}$//' <<< "$sse")"
fi
pd="$(dirname "$line")"
opt="-O$((RANDOM%4))"
if [[ "$((RANDOM%2))" == 0 ]];then
pipe=-pipe
fi
case $((RANDOM%4)) in
0) arch=-m32;;
1) arch="";;
*) arch=-m64;;
esac
if [[ "$((RANDOM%3))" == 0 ]];then
gnu="-D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L "
fi
flags="gcc -w $(xargs -n1 <<< "opt pipe gnu ssef arch"|sort -R|(while read line;do eval echo \$$line;done))"
fi
if [ -d "/usr/include/$line" ];then
echo $flags -shared $(for i in /usr/include/$line/*.h;do cut -d/ -f4- <<< "$i"|sed 's/h$/o/';done) -o "$line"".so"
sleep $((RANDOM%2+1))
else
line=$(sed 's/h$//' <<< "$line")
echo $flags -c $line"c" -o $line"o"
sleep 0.$((RANDOM%4))
fi
done
)
done
It uses data from /usr/include to create a realistic-looking compilation log. I was too lazy to throw random warnings in, so there's just a -w flag.
Random sample:
gcc -w -m64 -pipe -msse -msse2 -msse3 -O1 -c libiptc/xtcshared.c -o libiptc/xtcshared.o gcc -w -m64 -pipe -msse -msse2 -msse3 -O1 -c libiptc/libip6tc.c -o libiptc/libip6tc.o gcc -w -m64 -pipe -msse -msse2 -msse3 -O1 -c libiptc/libxtc.c -o libiptc/libxtc.o gcc -w -m64 -pipe -msse -msse2 -msse3 -O1 -c libiptc/ipt_kernel_headers.c -o libiptc/ipt_kernel_headers.o gcc -w -m64 -pipe -msse -msse2 -msse3 -O1 -c libiptc/libiptc.c -o libiptc/libiptc.o gcc -w -O2 -m64 -pipe -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -msse4_2 -shared libiptc/ipt_kernel_headers.o libiptc/libip6tc.o libiptc/libiptc.o libiptc/libxtc.o libiptc/xtcshared.o -o libiptc.so gcc -w -m64 -pipe -O0 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -c e2p/e2p.c -o e2p/e2p.o gcc -w -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -m64 -pipe -O1 -shared e2p/e2p.o -o e2p.so gcc -w -pipe -O0 -msse -msse2 -m64 -c spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-widget-enums.c -o spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-widget-enums.o gcc -w -pipe -O0 -msse -msse2 -m64 -c spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-grabsequence.c -o spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-grabsequence.o gcc -w -pipe -O0 -msse -msse2 -m64 -c spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-gtk-session.c -o spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-gtk-session.o gcc -w -pipe -O0 -msse -msse2 -m64 -c spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-widget.c -o spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-widget.o gcc -w -pipe -O0 -msse -msse2 -m64 -c spice-client-gtk-2.0/usb-device-widget.c -o spice-client-gtk-2.0/usb-device-widget.o gcc -w -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -O1 -shared spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-grabsequence.o spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-gtk-session.o spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-widget-enums.o spice-client-gtk-2.0/spice-widget.o spice-client-gtk-2.0/usb-device-widget.o -o spice-client-gtk-2.0.so gcc -w -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -O1 -c search.c -o search.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/path.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/path.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/scaledfont.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/scaledfont.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/fontface.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/fontface.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/quartz_font.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/quartz_font.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/win32_font.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/win32_font.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/refptr.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/refptr.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/cairomm.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/cairomm.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/context.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/context.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/enums.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/enums.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/win32_surface.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/win32_surface.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/pattern.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/pattern.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/types.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/types.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/matrix.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/matrix.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/quartz_surface.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/quartz_surface.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/exception.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/exception.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/device.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/device.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/surface.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/surface.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/xlib_surface.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/xlib_surface.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/fontoptions.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/fontoptions.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -c cairomm-1.0/cairomm/region.c -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/region.o gcc -w -O0 -pipe -m64 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -msse -msse2 -msse3 -msse4_1 -shared cairomm-1.0/cairomm/cairomm.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/context.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/device.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/enums.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/exception.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/fontface.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/fontoptions.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/matrix.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/path.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/pattern.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/quartz_font.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/quartz_surface.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/refptr.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/region.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/scaledfont.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/surface.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/types.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/win32_font.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/win32_surface.o cairomm-1.0/cairomm/xlib_surface.o -o cairomm-1.0/cairomm.so gcc -w -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -m64 -msse -O1 -pipe -shared cairomm-1.0/*.o -o cairomm-1.0.so gcc -w -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -m64 -msse -O1 -pipe -c ulockmgr.c -o ulockmgr.o gcc -w -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -m64 -msse -O1 -pipe -c gshadow.c -o gshadow.o gcc -w -O2 -msse -msse2 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -m64 -pipe -c dpkg/string.c -o dpkg/string.o gcc -w -O2 -msse -msse2 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -m64 -pipe -c dpkg/fdio.c -o dpkg/fdio.o gcc -w -O2 -msse -msse2 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -m64 -pipe -c dpkg/namevalue.c -o dpkg/namevalue.o gcc -w -O2 -msse -msse2 -D_GNU_SOURCE=1 -D_REENTRANT -D_POSIX_C_SOURCE=200112L -m64 -pipe -c dpkg/macros.c -o dpkg/macros.o
Bash
Infinitely displays random hexadecimal values, with some of them highlighted to make it feel like you are performing a complicated search in raw data.
while true; do head -c200 /dev/urandom | od -An -w50 -x | grep -E --color "([[:alpha:]][[:digit:]]){2}"; sleep 0.5; done
