Recreate an xkcd graph procedurally with your favorite plotting tool
Here's a stab.
Postscript
[Count deleted because this isn't a golf question.]
Added a "style" section to make it look more hand-drawn.
Edit: Helvetica responds better than Courier. Tweaked and enhanced this "style" section. And added comments.
%!
%futz with a coordinate pair
/f { 2 { rand 100 mod 100 div 1.47 mul
dup .4 mul sub add
exch } repeat } def
/op 2 array def %original point
/cp 2 array def %current point
/setcp { 2 copy cp astore pop } def %set current point
/difcp { cp aload pop %x' y' x y %diff between cp and point on stack
3 2 roll exch sub %x' x y'-y
3 1 roll sub %y'-y x'-x
exch %dx dy
} def
/scale2 { /n exch def %scale two values
n mul exch n mul exch
} def
/add2 {
3 2 roll add
3 1 roll add exch
} def
%futz with a path
/fpath {
2 {
%flattenpath
% replace lines with curves
[ { setcp cp op copy pop /moveto cvx }
{
%cp aload pop 4 2 roll 2 copy
2 copy difcp %x3 y3 x30 y30
2 copy 1 4 div scale2 %x3 y3 x30 y30 (1/3)x30 (1/3)y30
cp aload pop add2 %x3 y3 x30 y30 x1 y1
4 2 roll 3 4 div scale2 %x3 y3 x1 y1 (2/3)x30 (2/3)y30
cp aload pop add2 %x3 y3 x1 y1 x2 y3
6 4 roll %x1 y1 x2 y2 x3 y3
setcp
/curveto cvx }
{ setcp /curveto cvx }
{ op cp copy pop /closepath cvx } pathforall ] cvx newpath exec
% chop the curves
flattenpath
% futz all the points
[ { f
/moveto cvx }
{ f
/lineto cvx }
{ %f
f 6 2 roll
f 6 2 roll
f 6 2 roll
2 copy
/curveto cvx
3 1 roll
3{f}repeat /lineto cvx % extra triple-futz'd line after each curve
}
{ /closepath cvx } pathforall ] cvx newpath exec
} repeat
} def
%futz with strokes
/oldstroke /stroke load def
/stroke { fpath oldstroke } def
%futz with fills
/oldfill /fill load def
/fill { fpath oldfill } def
%make sure rectstroke doesn't bypass being futzed with
/rectstroke {
4 2 roll moveto
1 index 0 rlineto
0 exch rlineto
neg 0 rlineto
closepath
stroke
} def
%futz with strings
%by making sure show uses our futz'd fill
/show { gsave currentpoint newpath moveto dup
false charpath 1{fpath}repeat fill grestore stringwidth rmoveto } def
%fatter lines
1 setlinejoin %round joins
currentlinewidth 1.9 mul setlinewidth
%chop curves very small so there's lots of points for futzing
currentflat 6 div setflat
/Helvetica 10 selectfont
<<
/in{72 mul}
>>begin
1 in 1 in translate
0 0 6 in 4 in rectstroke
1 in 3 in moveto (WALKING BACK TO MY) show
1 in 2.8 in moveto (FRONT DOOR AT NIGHT:) show
36 3.5 in moveto
0 -2.8 in rlineto
5 in 0 rlineto
3.45 in .55 in moveto
0 20 rlineto
4.05 in .55 in moveto
0 20 rlineto
2.7 in .40 in moveto
(YARD STEPS DOOR INSIDE ) show
0 .05 in rmoveto
.4 in 0 rlineto
currentpoint
stroke
moveto
-10 3 rlineto
0 -6 rlineto fill
2.6 in .45 in moveto
-2 in 0 rlineto
currentpoint
stroke
moveto
10 3 rlineto
0 -6 rlineto fill
(FEAR) .9 in 2.3 in moveto show
(THAT THERE'S) .9 in 2.1 in moveto show
(SOMETHING) .9 in 1.9 in moveto show
(BEHIND ME) .9 in 1.7 in moveto show
1.8 in 1.86 in moveto
2 -26 rlineto
stroke
(FORWARD) 2.2 in 2.1 in moveto show
(SPEED) 2.2 in 1.9 in moveto show
2.75 in 2 in moveto
3 -13 rlineto
stroke
(EMBARRASSMENT) 4.5 in 2.5 in moveto show
4.6 in 2.65 in moveto
-2 20
-5 22
-27 25 rcurveto
stroke
.6 setgray %gray
40 1.6 in moveto
2.7 in 0
2.9 in 20
3.2 in 1.5 in rcurveto
10 20
20 20
30 0 rcurveto
15 -1.7 in
30 -1.8 in
1.4 in -2 in rcurveto
stroke
0 0 1 setrgbcolor %blue
40 1.2 in moveto
.9 in 27
.8 in 20
1.4 in 21 rcurveto
1 in -20
1.2 in 6
1.3 in 1.6 in rcurveto
10 20
20 20
30 0 rcurveto
15 -1.8 in
30 -1.9 in
1.8 in -2.1 in rcurveto
stroke
1 0 0 setrgbcolor %red
40 .9 in moveto
3.3 in 0
3.5 in 20
3.6 in 1.5 in rcurveto
10 72
20 80
30 80 rcurveto
.7 in -10
.3 in -35
1.1 in -40 rcurveto
stroke
%thank you for scrolling all the way down to here. :)
HTML5
@font-face {
font-family: 'Humor Sans';
font-style: normal;
font-weight: 400;
src: local('Humor Sans'), local('Humor Sans-Regular'), 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<title>Front Door ( from xkcd.com 1064 )</title>
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<body><h1>Front Door <div class="h1d">( from xkcd.com 1064 )</div></h1>
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<text x="100.15588" y="48.485607" transform="scale(0.00138889,0.00138889)"
style="font-size:14px;text-anchor:start">
<tspan x="100.15588" y="48.485607" id="tspan7010">WALKING BACK TO MY</tspan>
<tspan x="100.15588" y="65.285591" id="tspan7012">FRONT DOOR AT NIGHT:</tspan></text>
<rect width="0.24843951" height="0.065260872" x="0.12345294" y="0.039088331" />
<text x="0.23551519" y="0.20231472"><tspan x="0.23551519" y="0.20231472">fear</tspan>
<tspan x="0.23551519" y="0.22564805">ThAT there's</tspan>
<tspan x="0.23551519" y="0.24898137">something</tspan>
<tspan x="0.23551519" y="0.2723147">behing me</tspan></text>
<text x="0.36015913" y="0.22917171"><tspan x="0.36015913" y="0.22917171">fORWarD</tspan>
<tspan x="0.36015913" y="0.25250503">SPEED</tspan></text>
<text x="0.37393194" y="0.46812996"><tspan x="0.37393194" y="0.46812996">yarD</tspan>
<tspan x="0.45037103" y="0.46812996">step</tspan>
<tspan x="0.52267832" y="0.46812996">door</tspan>
<tspan x="0.58878779" y="0.46812996">inside</tspan></text>
<text x="0.63905853" y="0.20506927">
<tspan x="0.63905853" y="0.20506927">emBARRASSMENT</tspan></text>
</svg>
</body></html>Python
Makes use of the slightly cheat-y xkcd method in matplotlib:
import numpy as np
import matplotlib.pyplot as plt
from scipy.ndimage.filters import gaussian_filter1d
plt.xkcd()
x = np.linspace(0,10,1000)
unit = np.linspace(0,1,100)
speed = np.r_[np.ones(500)*3,3+5*unit**4.,np.ones(100)*8,1+7*unit[::-1]**2,np.ones(200)]
speed = gaussian_filter1d(speed,18)
fear = np.r_[np.linspace(0.5,2,450),2+6*unit**4,np.ones(100)*8,8*unit[::-1]**2,np.zeros(250)+0.1]
fear = gaussian_filter1d(fear,18)
fear_gauss_bump = 0.8*np.exp(-np.power(x-2.5,2.)/(2*np.power(1, 2.)))
fear += fear_gauss_bump
embarrassment = np.r_[np.zeros(600)+0.1, 9.5*unit**2, 9.5-np.linspace(0,1.5,300)]
embarrassment = gaussian_filter1d(embarrassment,60)
plt.figure(figsize=(12,6))
plt.plot(x,speed,c="gray")
plt.plot(x,fear,c="#1E9FDB")
plt.plot(x,embarrassment,c="r")
plt.plot([2.5,2.7],[3.9,2.3],c='k')
plt.plot([4.3,4.5],[3.6,3.1],c='k')
plt.plot(np.linspace(7.3,7.8,15),(0.25-(np.linspace(7.3,7.8,15)-7.3)**2)**0.5+7,c='k')
ax = plt.gca()
ax.spines['top'].set_visible(False)
ax.spines['right'].set_visible(False)
ax.get_xaxis().tick_bottom()
ax.get_yaxis().tick_left()
#plt.ylim([0,10])
ax.set_xticks([6,7])
ax.set_xticklabels(["STEPS","DOOR"])
ax.set_yticks([])
ax.text(2,4,"FEAR\nTHAT THERE'S\nSOMETHING\nBEHIND ME",horizontalalignment='center')
ax.text(3.9,3.4,"FORWARD\nSPEED",horizontalalignment='center')
ax.text(7.4,6.6,"EMBARRASSMENT")
ax.text(1,8,"WALKING BACK TO MY\nFRONT DOOR AT NIGHT:",bbox={'facecolor':'none', 'edgecolor':'black'})
ax.annotate("YARD", xy=(0.5,-0.3), xytext=(4.5,-0.4),annotation_clip=False,arrowprops={'facecolor':'black', 'shrink':0.01, 'width':0.5})
ax.annotate("INSIDE", xy=(10,-0.3), xytext=(7.5,-0.4),annotation_clip=False,arrowprops={'facecolor':'black', 'shrink':0.01, 'width':0.5})
plt.show()
