Chemistry - What actually happens in strong acid- weak base reactions?
The strategy of major species
You correctly describe the strategy. First, let reactions go to completion (in the direction that makes sense, i.e. weak base and strong acid forms weak acid and spectator ion - never the other way around). Then, check what the major species are and estimate the pH. Finally (and this step is often omitted), see if equilibria involving minor species (such as hydroxide for acidic solutions) need adjustment.
Why does the strategy of major species work?
For the example, the OP already calculated the estimated amount of species: 0.0075 mol of ammonium, and 0.013 mol of ammonia. With a total volume of 65 mL, that comes out as:
$$c_\ce{NH4+} = \pu{0.115M}$$ $$c_\ce{NH3} = \pu{0.20M}$$
From this, we can estimate the pH to be a bit more basic than the $\mathrm{p}K_\mathrm{a}$, i.e. 9.49. Now we can think about the minor species, hydroxide and hydronium. At pH = 9.49, there should be an excess of hydroxide over hydronium, by about 0.00003 M. Dissociation of water does not give an excess, so it has to come from ammonia turning into ammonium:
$$\ce{NH3 + H2O <=> NH4+ + OH-}$$
However, when this reaction makes hydroxide, it also changes the ratio of ammonium to ammonia, changing the pH. The only reason we don't keep running in circles, adjusting one equilibrium and then the other, is that this adjustment is tiny compared to the concentration of the major species. It amounts to decreasing the ammonia concentration by 0.00003 M and increasing the ammonium concentration by the same amount. The shift in pH is so small that it makes no difference when the pH is written with appropriate number of significant figures.
Alternate strategy
For the calculators we use, this is a good strategy to deal with multiple equilibria (in your case, that of the weak acid/base pair and autodissociation of water).
If you had an analog computer that adjusts the concentrations based on a "pH slider" and reports out whether all the constraints are met, there would be no reason to do this in multiple steps. Instead, you would just push your pH slider from one extreme to the other and stop when all equations are satisfied.
In your case, you could calculate the ratio of ammonia to ammonium from the pH and the $\mathrm{p}K_\mathrm{a}$, and the hydroxide concentration from the autodissociation constant of water. Then, you vary the pH until the charge balance (chloride plus hydroxide has to match hydronium plus ammonium) is achieved. It is a fun exercise to program this into a spread sheet.
What actually happens?
All reactions (any of the acids - water, hydronium or ammonium - reacting with any of the bases - water, ammonia or hydroxide) go on at the same time. The further from equilibrium a reaction is, the faster is the net change. Once all the reactions are at equilibrium, there is no more net change. The details depend on the kinetics but are not relevant to the equilibrium state that is finally reached.