Why is arc length not in the formula for the volume of a solid of revolution?
One way to gain the intuition behind this is to look at what happens in 2 dimensions. Here, rather than surface area and volume, we look at arc length and area under the curve. When we want to find the area under the curve, we estimate using rectangles. This is sufficient to get the area in a limit; one way to see why this is so is that both the error and the estimate are 2-dimensional, and so we aren't missing any extra information.
However, the analogous approach to approximating arc length is obviously bad: this would amount to approximating the curve by a sequence of constant steps (i.e. the top of the rectangles in a Riemann sum) and the length of this approximation is always just the length of the domain. Essentially, we are using a 1-dimensional approximation (i.e. only depending on $x$) for a 2-dimensional object (the curve), and so our approximation isn't taking into account the extra length coming from the other dimension. This is why the arc length is computed using a polygonal approximation by secants to the curve; this approximation incorporates both change in $x$ and change in $y$.
Why is this relevant to solids of revolution? Well, in essence, the volume and surface area formulae are obtained by simply rotating the corresponding 2-dimensional approximation rotated around an axis, and taking a limit. If it wouldn't work in 2 dimensions, it certainly won't work in 3 dimensions.