Installing and using XeTeX
The problem lies in the fact that you chose to create symbolic links for the executables in /usr/local/texlive/2011/bin/<architecture> to /usr/local/bin.
With tlmgr there's the possibility to update them, but the action is not performed automatically.
However, my advices are:
Always install the full TeX Live
Never create symbolic links, particularly on Debian based systems
If you don't have strict space constraints, do a full TeX Live install. It would have avoided the problem of installing the XeTeX subsystem.
Changing what's in /usr/local/bin is dangerous as other system utilities may choose to install something there. It's better to change the PATH variable and the safest method is to write a file zzz-texlive.sh containing
export PATH=/usr/local/texlive/2011/bin/`uname -i`-linux:$PATH
export MANPATH=/usr/local/texlive/2011/texmf/doc/man:$MANPATH
export INFOPATH=/usr/local/texlive/2011/texmf/doc/info:$INFOPATH
unset TEXINPUTS
unset TEXMFCONFIG
and move it into /etc/profile.d. After a logout/login cycle, the PATH variable will contain the correct directory for the executables.