The best stack-up possible with a four-layer PCB?

You will hate yourself if you do stack up number two ;) Maybe that's harsh but it's a going to be a PITA reworking a board with all internal signals. Don't be afraid of vias either.

Let's address some of your questions:

1.Signal layers are adjacent to ground planes.

Stop thinking about ground planes, and think more about reference planes. A signal running over a reference plane, whose voltage happens to be at VCC will still return over that reference plane. So the argument that somehow having your signal run over GND and not VCC is better is basically invalid.

2.Signal layers are tightly coupled (close) to their adjacent planes.

See number one I think the misunderstanding about only GND planes offering a return path leads to this misconception. What you want to do is keep your signals close to their reference planes, and at a constant correct impedance...

3.The ground planes can act as shields for the inner signal layers. (I think this requires stitching ??)

Yeah you could try to make a cage like this I guess, for your board you'll get better results keeping your trace to plane height as low as possible.

4.Multiple ground planes lower the ground (reference plane) impedance of the board and reduce the common-mode radiation. (don't really understand this one)

I think you've taken this to mean the more gnd planes I have the better, which is not really the case. This sounds like a broken rule of thumb to me.

My recommendation for your board based only on what you've told me is to do the following:

Signal Layer
(thin maybe 4-5mil FR4)
GND
(main FR-4 thickness, maybe 52 mil more or less depending on your final thickness)
VCC
(thin maybe 4-5mil FR4)
Signal Layer

Make sure you decouple properly.

Then if you really want to get into this go to amazon and buy either Dr Johnson's Highspeed digital design a handbook of black magic, or maybe Eric Bogatin's Signal and Power integrity Simplified. Read it love, live it :) Their websites have great information as well.

Good Luck!

There is no such thing as THE best layer stackup. If you read carefully, the stackup with grounds on outer layers is said to be best from EMC perspective.

I don't like that configuration, though. Firstly, if your board uses SMT components, you'll have a lot more breaks in your planes. Secondly, any debugging or rework will be virtually impossible.

If you need to use such a configuration, you're doing something horribly wrong.

Also, there is nothing wrong with using vias for grounding. If you need to lower the inductance, just place more vias.

"best" depends on the application. Theres really two questions to address in your post

1. "Conventional" (signals on outer layers, planes on inner layers) VS "inside-out" (signals on inner layers, planes on outer layers).
   An inside-out board will have better EMC performance but it will be much harder to modify when you realise you screwed up the design, will need more vias which is not great from a density or signal integrity point of view and if you are using IC packages whose pin pitch is too small to put ground between the pads then you end up with big holes in your planes which is also not great from a signal itegrity perspective.

2. two ground planes VS one ground plane and one power plane.
   In both cases when a high speed signal changes reference plane there needs to be a nearby path for it's return current to move between the two reference planes. With two ground planes you can do that with a single via connecting the two planes directly. With ground and power planes the connection has to go via a capacitor which typically (assuming a "conventional" stackup) requires two vias and a capacitor. That means worse signal integrity and more board area taken up. On the other hand having a power plane reduces volt drop on your power rail and frees up space on your signal layers.