Why doesn't mount respect the read only option for bind mounts?

Bind mount is just... well... a bind mount. I.e. it's not a new mount. It just "links"/"exposes"/"considers" a subdirectory as a new mount point. As such it cannot alter the mount parameters. That's why you're getting complaints:

# mount /mnt/1/lala /mnt/2 -o bind,ro
mount: warning: /mnt/2 seems to be mounted read-write.

But as you said a normal bind mount works:

# mount /mnt/1/lala /mnt/2 -o bind

And then a ro remount also works:

# mount /mnt/1/lala /mnt/2 -o bind,remount,ro 

However what happens is that you're changing the whole mount and not just this bind mount. If you take a look at /proc/mounts you'll see that both bind mount and the original mount change to read-only:

/dev/loop0 /mnt/1 ext2 ro,relatime,errors=continue,user_xattr,acl 0 0
/dev/loop0 /mnt/2 ext2 ro,relatime,errors=continue,user_xattr,acl 0 0

So what you're doing is like changing the initial mount to a read-only mount and then doing a bind mount which will of course be read-only.

UPDATE 2016-07-20:

The following are true for 4.5 kernels, but not true for 4.3 kernels (This is wrong. See update #2 below):

The kernel has two flags that control read-only:

• The MS_READONLY: Indicating whether the mount is read-only
• The MNT_READONLY: Indicating whether the "user" wants it read-only

On a 4.5 kernel, doing a mount -o bind,ro will actually do the trick. For example, this:

# mkdir /tmp/test
# mkdir /tmp/test/a /tmp/test/b
# mount -t tmpfs none /tmp/test/a
# mkdir /tmp/test/a/d
# mount -o bind,ro /tmp/test/a/d /tmp/test/b

will create a read-only bind mount of /tmp/test/a/d to /tmp/test/b, which will be visible in /proc/mounts as:

none /tmp/test/a tmpfs rw,relatime 0 0
none /tmp/test/b tmpfs ro,relatime 0 0

A more detailed view is visible in /proc/self/mountinfo, which takes into consideration the user view (namespace). The relevant lines will be these:

363 74 0:49 / /tmp/test/a rw,relatime shared:273 - tmpfs none rw
368 74 0:49 /d /tmp/test/b ro,relatime shared:273 - tmpfs none rw

Where on the second line, you can see that it says both ro (MNT_READONLY) and rw (!MS_READONLY).

The end result is this:

# echo a > /tmp/test/a/d/f
# echo a > /tmp/test/b/f
-su: /tmp/test/b/f: Read-only file system

UPDATE 2016-07-20 #2:

A bit more digging into this shows that the behavior in fact depends on the version of libmount which is part of util-linux. Support for this was added with this commit and was released with version 2.27:

commit 9ac77b8a78452eab0612523d27fee52159f5016a
Author: Karel Zak 
Date:   Mon Aug 17 11:54:26 2015 +0200

    libmount: add support for "bind,ro"

    Now it's necessary t use two mount(8) calls to create a read-only
    mount:

      mount /foo /bar -o bind
      mount /bar -o remount,ro,bind

    This patch allows to specify "bind,ro" and the remount is done
    automatically by libmount by additional mount(2) syscall. It's not
    atomic of course.

    Signed-off-by: Karel Zak 

which also provides the workaround. The behavior can be seen using strace on an older and a newer mount:

Old:

mount("/tmp/test/a/d", "/tmp/test/b", 0x222e240, MS_MGC_VAL|MS_RDONLY|MS_BIND, NULL) = 0 <0.000681>

New:

mount("/tmp/test/a/d", "/tmp/test/b", 0x1a8ee90, MS_MGC_VAL|MS_RDONLY|MS_BIND, NULL) = 0 <0.011492>
mount("none", "/tmp/test/b", NULL, MS_RDONLY|MS_REMOUNT|MS_BIND, NULL) = 0 <0.006281>

Conclusion:

To achieve the desired result one needs to run two commands (as @Thomas already said):

mount SRC DST -o bind
mount DST -o remount,ro,bind

Newer versions of mount (util-linux >=2.27) do this automatically when one runs

mount SRC DST -o bind,ro

The proper solution is really to mount it twice. On the command line:

mount -t none -o bind /source/dir /destination/dir
mount -t none -o bind,remount,ro /source/dir /destination/dir

In /etc/fstab:

/source/dir            /destination/dir    none  bind            0 0
/source/dir            /destination/dir    none  remount,bind,ro 0 0

The manual (man mount) states it that way:

   The bind mounts.
          Since Linux 2.4.0 it is possible to remount part of the file hierarchy somewhere else. The call is
                 mount --bind olddir newdir
   [...]
          Note that the filesystem mount options will remain the same as those on the original mount point, and cannot be changed  by  passing  the  -o  option
          along with --bind/--rbind. The mount options can be changed by a separate remount command, for example:
          .
                 mount --bind olddir newdir
                 mount -o remount,ro newdir
          .
          Note  that  behavior  of  the remount operation depends on the /etc/mtab file. The first command stores the 'bind' flag to the /etc/mtab file and the
          second command reads the flag from the file.  If you have a system without the /etc/mtab file or if you explicitly define source and target  for  the
          remount command (then mount(8) does not read /etc/mtab), then you have to use bind flag (or option) for the remount command too. For example:
          .
                 mount --bind olddir newdir
                 mount -o remount,ro,bind olddir newdir