How can I not fail hard at QWOP?

Tap O at the beginning to lean forward a little

After that, you use WO and QP alternately take your strides. Make sure you stay leaning slightly forward. Don't wait until your front foot hits the ground before you take your next stride; push off a little earlier.

Be prepared to fail many, many times.

An alternate method that some people use to get far is basically falling to their knees and only using Q and W (thighs) and dragging themselves along. This really only gives me a good excuse to post this inspirational video.

Instead of hitting w and o at the same time, hit them in really quick succession. It works a lot better and you can run faster.